Easter Bunny Blues

I had high hopes this morning that we would go and see the Easter bunny and that Mark would actually be happy about it.  Nope!  It was a traumatic event and even with promises of lollipops he still wasn't budging.  He clung onto me like he was being sent to his death.  I suppose I knew that it was going to happen but one can hope :) 

And then there were three....

Being pregnant with twins is hard!  I feel like any complaints that I had while pregnant with Mark were soooo ridiculous!  As time goes on I'm amazed at how my body is changing and adapting to growing two people.  As I continue to grow and change so does our house!  The many projects that are going on have kept us busy all weekend.  The basement seems like a never ending project that we are so anxious to have done we can barely stand it!  We moved Marks changing table into the nursery today and got him a toy bin for his soon to be "big boy room."  It seemed so strange moving it out of his room and realizing that he is no longer a baby.  We still have much of the nursery to complete and the guest room needs painting and furniture it piled up.  It all seems like so much with the babies coming but I know in good time everything will find it's place and we will be ready.  Well, as ready as we can be with a 2 year old and newborn twins :) 

And we're down to one...

So today we officially switched to one nap.  We have been going on and off with the two naps for a few weeks now.  Some days he has seemed like he still needed it and other days it was just a complete fight.   After a late nap, bedtime was becoming a struggle and last night he was up in the middle of the night which NEVER happens anymore.  So today we pushed through the late afternoon and he was a bit cranky but nothing we couldn't handle and bedtime was a breeze!!  There was absolutely no crying and he was sleeping in minutes!  Hopefully that was the beginning of getting us on a great schedule.  It will be nice to have the extra time in the afternoons now and not have to race back home for naptime.

Finding my place

It has occurred to me that finding out who you are as a mom is a tough thing to do.  I was so consumed by Mark being an infant for the past year that it never really was an issue for me.  I was focused on his every need and on breastfeeding.  Now that he is officially a toddler...which I still have a hard time believing that he could be...I have started to look at myself again and think who are you?  It's amazing how much time and energy we put into our children and many times we lose sight of ourselves and what we need for our own self fulfillment.  I have always been a person who has kept myself really busy.  Whether is was in high school, college or in my career.  Everyone who knows me well knows that I take on a million things and somehow manage to get to them all.  I thrive on it.  Now that Mark is a year old and the breastfeeding has stopped I find myself having a lot of extra time.  I have started to consider what this means for me.  As a person who is constantly busy this is a difficult place for me to be in....

13.1 or bust

Well I made it the entire 13.1 miles today....it was a tough one.  I had my nike plus freeze up on me around mile 5 and then it started pouring out.  Of course I whimped out and ran home to jump on the treadmill and finish up there.  BUT  I did finish and did it in 2 hours and 20 mins....not bad for my first attempt.  That should hopefully put me around 4 and a half hours on marathon day.  After running a half marathon we went to buy Mark his big boy car seat.  We went into buy buy baby and man do they have A LOT of stuff!!  I had no idea there was so much baby stuff in one store.  That place put babies r us to shame!  We found his britx carseat along with a few other things and headed out.  He seemed pretty happy once in it...although I thought he looked a little confused :)  He looked like such a big boy sitting there finally facing forward.  Sometimes I can't believe that he's a toddler now and growing up...doesn't seem possible. 

This afternoon I did another cake and we babysit for a good friend.  It was a lot of fun to see the kids playing together and gave Shawn and I good practice for baby number two...someday :).  After a long day Im slowing creaking these tired muscles onto the couch for some much deserved R and R. 

Could it be.....

Could it really be two months since I last blogged?  Time seems to be slipping away from me like crazy lately.  Planning Mark's first birthday party was quite a time sucker but worth every minute!  We had a blast and it was so great to celebrate with peole we love.  He seemed to hvae a really good time and ate lots of cake...that momma spent days and days making!  I have been busy trying to get my cake business started which has thankfully been successful.   My training is coming along well...I have 13 miles to tackle tomorrow morning which is more mentally getting to me than anything else.  I have been keeping up with my miles during the week and am hoping that will help me get through the 13.

My new project in life is filling out applications for teaching positions.  I have been going back and forth with it for a few months now and finally decided to send them out.  Im still not positive if I can leave Mark but I figure that sending them out is only the first step and nothing permanent is decided.  Part of me really misses my career that I worked very hard for....the other part of me looks at Mark and thinks "how could you leave him?"  Why is it as mom's we have to make those kinds of decisions?  It doesn't seem fair....and I know...life isn't fair sometimes :)

Tough week...

This week was a hard one.  Im not sure where to start or what to blame.  Mark was up at the very early hour of 5am all week...which was the first strike.  I was exhausted and not thinking straight.  I found out that his crib was part of the Graco recall.  Probably worst of all is that I haven't been feeling well.  I have been getting that "head rush" feeling often lately.  I have also been getting headaches, joint pain and been naseous.  What gives??  I started researching it and so so so many of my symptoms seems to match up with a hypothyroid problem.  It all seems to make sense.  I have always been overweight....not fat but I definitely carry around more weight on my body than I should be.  I have been exhausted as far back as my memory will go.  It just doesnt make sense to me....especially at this point in my life.  I have given up drinking all soda, I no longer eat processed food and am training for a marathon!!  I should be feeling at the top of my game!  So I decided that I was going to call the dr and find out what was going on.  I go for my appt on Tues and am looking forward to getting some answers.  On top of everything I pulled the SAME muscle in my back that I have pulled countless times...so I spent this morning searching for a new chiro to put me back together again....I will see him on Mon night.   This being said I wasn't able to run this morning and that was frustrating.